Hope and Pain: The Delicate Balance of Expectation

 By: Nwogu Chinemerem

Sixteen years ago, I was thrilled when I received an invitation to take a written test for a reporter position at a prominent national newspaper. At the time, I was working for another national daily but had long hoped to transition to this new publication. The attraction wasn’t just about the pay, but also the professional visibility it promised.

 

The test itself was straightforward—an essay on the legality and morality of security agencies enforcing decent dressing. This was sparked by the controversy surrounding a widely reported incident in which police officers allegedly harassed women for their attire in Aba. I put my best effort into the essay and, as always, I felt confident in my ability to excel. My hopes were high; after all, I had never failed in any essay test, whether academic or professional.

But within my hope, there was also pain. The waiting game began. As days turned into weeks, and weeks into months, the anticipation became more intense. I waited eagerly for an invitation to an oral interview. But it never came.

One day, I bumped into an insider from the newspaper who revealed that the company had decided not to proceed with the recruitment process due to financial constraints. Suddenly, the weight of my anxiety lifted. The hope I had nurtured, which had caused me so much anxiety, was extinguished.

Looking back, I’m grateful to this informant, though I wish they had shared the news earlier. It would have saved me the anxiety I endured during that long, restless wait. From this experience, I’ve come to realize a fundamental truth: in our hopes and expectations, we also carry fears and anxiety.

Hope, though essential, can be a double-edged sword. It’s the driving force that propels us through life, giving us the strength to face challenges and difficult circumstances. Without hope, despair sets in, killing our determination. And without determination, nothing can be achieved.

Yet, as necessary as hope is, it must be tempered. Too much hope can become detrimental. It can rob us of our peace of mind as we wait impatiently for our expectations to materialize. When hope becomes obsessive, it can make us unrealistic optimists, unable to accept unpleasant truths when they arise.

This is why hope must be approached with caution. It’s a virtue as long as it helps us persevere without falling into despair. But when it starts to cause unnecessary anxiety or turns us into dreamers without a grasp on reality, it loses its value.

Hope is crucial to our personal growth and success, but let’s remember: in our hope, there is also pain. As we navigate through life, we must hope wisely, balancing our desire for a better future with the acceptance of present realities.

Henry Chigozie Duru, PhD, teaches Journalism and Mass Communication at Nnamdi Azikiwe University, Awka, Nigeria.